Hi {{ Name | there }},
After months of sending applications, interviews, and rejections, a Career Mama member finally got a job offer.
It should have felt like a win. But it didn’t. Her salary was way lower than she expected. 💔
With support from the community, she negotiated and walked away with more.
Here’s the catch: While she knew she should ask for more, she almost didn’t.
Her fear?
“I don’t want to seem greedy or ungrateful. I already feel lucky to have the offer.”
If you’ve ever said yes when you wanted to push back… you're not alone.
I see this all the time, especially among women navigating career, caregiving, and the constant pressure to be “easy to work with.”
Research shows women are twice as likely not to negotiate.
It shows up in moments like:
Accepting the first offer without asking about flexibility, benefits, or scope
Agreeing to take on a stretch assignment without discussing extra support or visibility
Not bringing up a promotion you were promised because you don't want to “push”
Avoiding the comp conversation when you’re only a few months away from going on parental leave
Saying yes to travel-heavy roles without negotiating for childcare or schedule adjustments
All because:
We don’t want to be difficult.
We don’t want to seem “too much.”
We worry what if our ask is rejected.
So we stay polite. Say thank you. And quietly take the hit.
But avoiding hard conversations hurts your career more than it helps.
Here are 3 strategies Career Mamas use to negotiate with stakeholders and get them to say yes.
#1 Reframe negotiation as alignment, not conflict
You’re not being greedy. You’re making sure the setup actually works, for you and for them.
Use these scripts:
“I’m excited about this opportunity, and I want to set us up for long-term success. Could we revisit the offer to better reflect the role’s scope and expectations?”
“As I return from leave, I’d love to realign on role expectations to reflect both the current scope and my performance.”
“I’m excited to expand my role. Given my increased scope, I’d love to discuss how this impacts my leveling and compensation.
#2 Set clear timelines for follow-ups
One mistake? Waiting silently after your manager says, “Let me get back to you.”
You can avoid awkward chases by locking in the next step in the moment.
Try these:
“We had discussed a promotion earlier this year. Could we check in on next steps and timeline?”
“When should we touch base again? I’ll make a note to follow up.”
When you set the follow-up date in advance, you create accountability without feeling pushy.
#3 Lead with solutions, not just needs
Especially when work asks clash with caregiving, travel, or health priorities.
Instead of:
“Is there space to adjust the travel schedule?”
Say:
“I have a few ideas to structure the travel in a way that supports both team goals and my caregiving setup. Can we chat about it?”
Or:
“I want to make this sustainable and impactful—for the team and for me. I’d love to share suggestions on how we can make that work.”
When you position your ask as a win-win, it lands stronger.
You can advocate for yourself without feeling guilty of asking for more.
You can ask for more and still be deeply collaborative.
Quick gut check:
Do you prep before negotiating?
Have you ever been in any of these situations? How did you navigate them?
See you next Thursday.
Cheers,
Shivani
P.S. I’d love your help to getting on the SXSW Conference stage to talk about: “Motherhood is a Power Move: AI Can’t Replace a Mom’s Skills”. I’ll be joined by rockstar leaders including Bobbie’s Co-founder, Salesforce’s SVP, and the Chairwoman of the News Product Alliance to have an unfiltered conversation to share strategies that helped us reach the top while showing up for our families.
If this resonates, please heart our panel by clicking here (takes 5 seconds).
SXSW uses public voting to pick panels so your vote truly counts.🙏 Let’s change the narrative together!
Was this newsletter forwarded to you?